Day 264: Storm of Reactions 2: How to Stop Reacting in Spite

coming together 2coming-togetherFor proper perspective to this post, please read Day 263:  A Storm of Reactions: Acting in Spite   Excerpt:   I was at an AA (alcoholics anonymous) meeting last night, which was a 20 year medallion for a friendmeaning 20 years of sobriety… I was aware of several emotional reactions/backchat/thoughts/memories coming up into my mind, slow at first and then like a storm, throughout the hour and a half gathering.  So I will face them here within self-forgiveness and commitment statements and walk a self-correction process (living the commitment statement I write here) as I go about my day to day living and attend meetings in the future.

When and as I see myself going into judgement of another, in this case a speaker at a AA meeting, I stop and breathe. I bring myself/awareness back to physical reality out of my mind of thoughtsmemories, opinions, blame, projections. I make sure/remind myself that each person here is in their own process and I have no right to judge another but that I should look within and understand what is going on within myself, as to why such energies are coming up-what do I hear that is existent in me? Thus, I commit myself to take self-responsibility to ensure I am stable and so do not react/project outward onto another in spite.

When and as I see myself becoming the ‘needing to be liked’ character by thinking I ‘need’ to talk to someone , I stop and breathe. I feel my feet on the ground and remind myself I am a physical being here on earth and stay out of my mind. I realize I am not really concerned with them , as in the need to take care of them, but I am participating within self-interest, in disguise, because it fulfills a desire in me, as how I have defined myself in my mind throughout my life, as someone who ‘helps’ and ‘cares’. Thus, I commitmyself to speak with people without an energy ‘fix’ attached but express myself to others in self-honesty in the moment, not planned out in my head as ‘oh, I should talk to them because they need me’, thereby eliminating further mind bs of guilt if I don’t speak with them, annoyance/anger of an obligation, positive energy experience if I do speak with them like ‘I’m such a good person’.

When and as I see myself looking at men as sexual objects, I stop and breathe. I make sure I am here/present when at a meeting/speaking to men and not in my mind of opinions/judgements/desires/self-interest. I realize  if I am objectifying the man I am speaking to /listening to I am not fully present and thus cannot fully hear what they are communicating to me, therefore I cannot enjoy the interaction/learn from the conversation/assist and support the other person. I also realize I do not like it (overall) when men objectify me/ women in general so why would I want to do this to another?  I commit myself to the process of being fully here in awareness when listening/speaking to men and not seeing them as sexual objects but as beings, one and equal to myself.


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Investigate Desteni, investigate the forum where one is invited to write oneself out in self-honesty and where any questions regarding the Desteni Material will be answered by Destonians who are walking their own process. Visit the Destonian Network where videos and blogs are streamed daily. Suggest to also check out the Desteni I Process and Relationship courses as well as the FREE DIP Lite course


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