Please read Suppression: Inferiority Part 1 and Part 2 for context to this blog: You Can Re-Create Yourself: From Suppression to Self-Expression Part 1
From Part 1: Here I begin to examine my feelings of inferiority towards M, a point which has been suppressed within me my entire life. This is a new point that emerged when speaking with my DIP Buddy, as she assisted me to see how my reaction of fear was actually one of feeling inferior. I did not know that!
Self Corrective Application and Commitment Statements
When and as I see myself thinking M is wrong, difficult to understand/doesn’t understand me and then participating in spiteful backchat I stop and I breathe. I remind myself to access what is here in the physical and to focus on solutions. I realize I bring the past with me when I have these thoughts, with all sorts of assumptions and opinions and have no right to judge M. as I do not know how she/he is experiencing life and all his/her pre-programming. Thus I commit myself to focus on understanding, slowing myself down and to be self-honest in the moment, thus allowing communication/our relationship to no longer be limited by the past but open to grow/expand in equality and solutions that are best for all involved.
When and as I see myself reacting with all sorts of emotion to M. wanting to give up/thinking this is too much to handle I stop and I breathe. I remind myself to get out of my head, use my breath to stabilize the emotional reactions. I realize I have relied on thesereactions for years to ‘make me feel better’ about myself in relation to M. I use this ‘positive’ ego energy experience where I make myself superior to M and put her down in my mind to assert a position of strength, whenever I think and or fear she /he has the ‘upper hand’. I can see the times I have stopped my reactions the conversation flows instead of sparks building and communication breaking down. Thus I commit myself to be more aware when speaking with M. and stop myself immediately when I feel anyreaction arise.
When and as I see myself becoming the bullying character, where I swing from the positive energy experience of superiority to the negative of inferiority, coming out as guilt for having put her/him down in my mind, I stop and I breathe. I realize both of thesepolarized reactions are just veils, covering the truth of me: the bully distracts me from the initial reaction of anger/spitefulness, which is there to cover the fact that I feel inferior in relation to the how we grew up, past mistakes I have made, money, power. Thus I commit myself to stop victimizing myself by stabilizing with breath, and then letting go of these two polarized reactions. I also commit myself to let go of the initial fear/inferiority point by reminding myself the truth; that we are just two physical beings here in equality and when I am calm he/she is also calm and we are able to create solutions and communicate with relative ease, realizing no one can harm me/emotionally abuse me unless I allow it.
Eqafe: Series on Suppression Starts here: Suppression: Introduction – Atlanteans – Part 218
Cool Google Hangouts: To watch and to join in! You can participate in live hangouts each week, ask questions.
Personal Growth: DIP: https://www.youtube.com/user/DesteniIProcess
A Living Income Guaranteed LIG: https://www.youtube.com/user/BIGuaranteed
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support