Day 356: Fearing My Thoughts Speeding Up/Moving Too Fast

worry 2I have been experiencing ‘crisis after crisis’ in relation to process, more specifically in relation to how my own mind is responding to process, over the last several weeks. I had been slowing down in order to stabilize some physical points (night sweats-thus lack of sleep-and digestion problems) that I could see are more severe when I am participating in emotional/feeling reactions throughout any given day.

I now see that I don’t need to stop my process- of investigating points through writing, self-forgiveness and corrective application- like, ‘first I will physically stabilize and then I will continue my JTL (Journey to Life) blogging’ or ‘I need to have all this stuff in my mind completely calmed down and organized before I start writing about it’.

Not sure where best to /how to start so I will simply start writing and -as I have seen over the last few years of blogging- things will begin to smooth out/flow/become more clear as I move along. Here and in future posts, I will be taking each point and deconstructing it in more detail, with the support of my DIP buddy (see: Desteni I Process Pro Course).

I seem to have been experiencing alot of tough lessons lately. That is ok, I am facing me, what I have created throughout my life, as what I have accepted and allowed.

I have allowed the mind to speed up in the last 3-4 weeks-too many thoughts, moving too fast-and then participate in them by relating/beLIEving them/taking them literally instead of calming myself down with breath and body awareness the moment I see this has started. Then I related this experience to a past experience of when this same thing happened 20 years ago. I reacted to this memory with massive fear and fell into thinking patterns that looped in a vicious cycle, basically thoughts like, ‘I can’t stop the thoughts, they are coming faster and I cannot stop! I will go insane and die, or-even if I get through this- I will create disease in myself and die!’

NOTE: it was the word ‘suicide’ popping up in my mind that I was reacting to-like it was a solution/alternative-just like 20 years ago-I was not /am not in any way considering this as an option/solution to thoughts moving to fast lol- no way- I am here and in the process of becoming life, in a process of birthing myself as life in the physical. I will not allow one thought/the mind to trick me into beLIEving ending my life is a solution! The point here is to- not ignore or suppress but- face the thought and reaction of fear-in order to eliminate it from ones life. One would still have a memory of what occurred/the past but no longer experience the emotional connection of fear -that was attached to that memory/or word, simply see it , ‘yes, that it what happened and that is how Ireacted‘ and move on with whatever you were doing in your day/your reality. Thus, a process (overtime) to remove the harmful reactions: fear/anxiety/stress/self-blame/self-judgements, so one may learn to truly live, freely expressing in each moment, no longer allowing one word/memory/or any thinking patterns to control you.

TO CONTINUE

 

DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime
desteni.org – Participate in Forums or Search the Vast Desteni Material
Creations Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs

 

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2 thoughts on “Day 356: Fearing My Thoughts Speeding Up/Moving Too Fast

  1. He descubierto que la mas eficaz manera de no temer a mis pensamientos es observarme en cada respiro y caminar cada una de las experiencias que se presentan en mi vivir cotidiano. gracias

    1. ‘I found that the most effective way to not fear my thoughts is watching me with every breath and walk every one of the experiences that occur in my daily life . thank you’ Cool, thank you Sofia :)

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