I have been experiencing extreme anxiety/stress lately. I seem to have constructed a whole panic system within me, thought patterns that are now activating in quantum time-meaning without even having the thoughts/emotions come up/ into my conscious awareness-just the body responding within a panicked state of : constricted throat, very tight chest and solar plexes, an overall feeling/experience of anxiety. This can be very frightening! Although I am working through this, now I am finding just accessing a MEMORY of a previous panic attack is enough to ignite the whole system/construct! The series on Eqafe: Panic Attacks is proving invaluable. I can see that my internal panic system is closely linked to RUSHING. Anything I have created within me I can re-create/change! Time to change!
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sweat the small stuff/make mountains out of mole hills, as in the daily task and responsibilities I have to perform, reviewing them in my head–getting ahead of myself–meaning, as I am doing one task, I am thinking about the next, never allowing myself to be present in the moment-in peace-and focus, thus building up energies as I go along, and tensing my body more and more as I am moving about.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that, as I am not here in the present moment within daily tasks/responsibilities, I am separating myself from my body causing behavioral changes like: nausea, pain in forehead-eyebrows, constricting throat, tightness in chest and solar plexus and swirling/queasy stomach–resulting in increased intense sweats (the menopause system), digestion problems and hemorrhoids.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in fear, laziness, postponement, and worry to daily responsibilities.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in pictures that pop up in my mind, as I am performing daily tasks, and follow that picture down the rabbit hole into my imagination and/or memories, particularily of family members and recent tv shows/movies I have watched.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attach an emotional reaction of anxiety to the memory of recent panic attacks, specifically having dinner with my family trying to be ‘normal’.
I forgive myself that I havn’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that, as long as I’m holding onto this emotional reaction of anxiety-to a panic attack that happened in a memory-this memory and emotional charge of anxiety will continue feeding this panic system within myself in the present.
I assist and support myself -to in this moment- take a breath , let the anxiety go as I am speaking this self-forgiveness, set the memory free to be but a remembrance and not have any more control of my present day life experiences.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attach a physical, emotional, reactive response to this memory of a panic attack.
I forgive myself that I havn’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand or even be aware of the emotional reactions on a physical level I have attached to this particular memory of a panic attack.
I forgive myself that I havn’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that as long as this memory exists as a emotional physical reaction within myself, I am feeding the very thing that I am afraid of, which is panic.
I forgive myself that I havn’t accepted and allowed myself to get to know my relationship to these memories on an emotional as well as physical level, where I am only now becoming aware of how much emotional energy I’ve attached to these particular memories of panic.
I assist and support myself to set myself and my body free from the emotions I have built up in relation to these panic attacks.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to put myself and my body through these emotional reactions to memories.
I assist and support myself -and as well my body- to set me and my body free from these emotional possessions.
I commit myself to change from an energy being to a physical being, by slowing down and to move with breath, which is moving with and as the physical, within equality and oneness with and as life: 4 counts in, hold 4 counts, 4 counts out, hold 4 counts.
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