Day 31: Deleting the “I’m A Good Person” Character

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing when I have become the ‘I’m a good person’ character.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing as the ‘I’m a good person’ character I  was participating in the first/activating thought, as one word or picture/pixel in my mind as; helpful/happy/good/smile/nice and the ‘smiling thought’, like, I’m happy and the person is happy , thereby setting in motion a slew of thoughts as this character takes over/controls my very beingness and my day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize, as the ‘I’m a good person’ character, I then follow/engage in inner conversation/backchat in the form of sentences, within and as my mind of: “I wonder if I can get away with asking them for this/that now, maybe they’ll loan  me money now …how would I pay them back…maybe I shouldn’t but they owe me now….I’m a better person than them…maybe I should wait a week before I ask them for a loan, they will like me now, I’m superior to them.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize, as the ‘I’m a good person’ character, I have participated in reactions in the form of emotions and feelings within / as this character of;  anxiety, nervousness, worry as I wait for them to compliment me/wonder if the situation will ‘play out’ the way I had hoped and the character will receive its reward as an energy experience…desire to be validated so an expectation, pride, and superiority.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize, as the ‘I’m a good person’ character, I have participated in the following physical  reactions/responses:  shortness in breath, tight squinting eyes, tight shoulders, tense upper body as the moment of expectation, waiting the response/validation/key for the character to activate, voice and face tonality/structure change, chest uplifted/pushed forward.

I commit myself to assist and support myself, through writing, self-forgiveness and a daily self-corrective application, to stop all participation in/as the  ‘I’m a good person’ character by being here in breath awareness each moment and so to be aware when that first thought as either word-helpful/happy/good/smile/nice- or picture/single pixel as the smiling recipient of my ‘good’ action, as character activation, arises as I now see/realize/understand to allow this initial thought and the inner chatter/backchat, reactions and behaviors that inevitably follow is to allow my acceptance to slavery to the mind, and thus I will not be the directive force/principal of my life here but simply re-live the past over and over as an organic robot, not changing me as what is best for all life on earth.

I commit myself to show, through writing, self-forgiveness and a daily self-corrective application, it is possible to be aware of and stop participation in following/relating to inner conversation/backchat in the form of sentences as that either are based solely on self-interest either in the form of positive statements about the act I performed/how the other person is responding to it or used as a manipulation character looking for a later reward. In that I commit to stop myself whenever i see I am engaging in this character as I now see realize understand it comes from a point of a want to be fulfilled for myself, for a positive energy feeling or a reward and not from a one and equal point, here, to support and assist another being when I am able to, desiring/needing nothing in return.

I commit myself to, through a daily application of principled living, to stop myself whenever I become aware of  emotions coming up from becoming the  ‘I’m a good person’ character of  pride, excitement, worry/anxiety/anticipation waiting for a reward, waiting for validation/a response telling me how wonderful I am as I now see/realize/understand  to refuse to participate in these emotions strengthens my stand in the decision of who I am and what I do by NOT allowing the mind to manipulate me with energy, and thus using the tools of writing and self-forgiveness I assist and support myself with energy layer releases each time I remain here and say no to the mind.

I commit myself to nothingness, free from thoughts, feelings, emotions, reactions, internal conversations, characters and personalities and backchat.